400 thoughts on ““I am lucky to be a Stay at Home Mom (SAHM)””

1. Hi Mehanu,
   I knw u dnt need to hear this yet another time, but I have to say- great article, great spirit….
   I have been working for 8 years now,have 4 yr old daughter and for the past 6 months have been contemplating becoming a SAHM.Just like you I dnt think um not that ambitious and would enjoy my life more looking after my daughter and home,but was stuck with so many what-ifs, many of which you listed, but after reading ur article, I just sealed the deal, I am ready to take the plunge….cant thank you enough.

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2. There are pros and cons of being both, a SAHM or a WM. My mother was a working mom and did a fabulous job with the two of us. While, there are also mothers who stay at home and yet don’t give their all as they know they have all the time with the children. I believe that you should do whatever is best for your home, husband and overall life.
   Just looking at it from the perspective of positives does not work, there has to be a practical approach too. When kids outgrow the stage where they need you as much, what are you to do then? You are left feeling empty. Your own independence is very important also.
   All in all, I believe you should do whatever makes you feel happy and satisfied 🙂

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   1. I agree with you completely!

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3. Very well written ! You have nailed it down to the minutest details …I too was working in India and quit work to join my husband in China. Now i am a happy SAHM to twin baby girls and I am loving it !!

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4. Loved this article. Very well written.

   Its very true that choice is ours.

   But whatever you are , WH or SAHM, we hv duties and our own ups and downs. Just enjoy. I was working in India and then quit my job as i got into family way . My parents were firm that i should raise my kids myself , enjoy the phase and get to know the ups and downs in raising kids.im happy. Though my husband had missed the important stages of both the babies, i have captured all for him which i could do only because i was with them.

   Moving to Singapore, i found both types of moms here but the WM is totally dependent on helpers which is why there is a demand of helpers here. My kids come home and hug me and thank me because they listen to their classmates stories on burnt food/no guidance on studying or projects/ day care center stories/helper handling/ school appointments/meetings worse is birthdays…
   But 1 thing i hvnt come out is like wht you (author) mentioned. Money. I still cautiously spend only on him and kids. That was because there was time when i had earned my money for years even post marriage. Again that should change as years go i believe.

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   1. You might want to read Laura’s comments above on money…

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5. each and every phrase of your article is 100% truth, you have just penned down your heart

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6. lovely article!!…I can relate each n every point …though I heard in India that “she is not getting a job that’s why she is a SAHM..n covering it saying that her kids need her more than anyone else”…but I feel if a woman decides to stay at home it makes a lot of other peoples life easy like your husband get relaxed, your in laws get relaxed, your parents get
   relaxed that someone is there to take care of the kids we dnt need to worry …n if you are working everybody is disturbed which doesn’t make any sense to be working if you can’t buy happiness n relaxation for your dear ones…great article

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7. Still Smiling… I can relate to each and every line you wrote… 🙂

   I have recently joined back post 2 years’ sabbatical at work (I am in Advertising too)… To tell you the truth… its really not worth it…

   Thinking.. thinking.. thinking..

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   1. Hi Friend… How are you doing ? Do you have kids ?

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8. You spoke my heart out…loved reading your post. Even I stay at home n out of my choice but I do believe that moms are the true guidance to kids life so I want to show my kids that we can be independent hence work is imp however big or small it is.if they don’t see me managing him n work. In future they will b too sitting at home , I never want that…the biggest n precious gift I cn offer my kids s my experience and education.

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   1. You know its surprising that people tell me that they work to teach their kids to be independent… Really ?? Can’t a SAHM teach independence ?

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      1. ITs not about being working or not , as u said , SAHM never gets their respect as housework is treated as just a normal routine work, even when we are working we do household work but still when we are out of time and have to find out time for anything its appreciated. else its never , its a basic human mentality ,and can never be changed. Hence I strongly feel , To be more appreciated by our kids and teach them that being independent earns more self respect we have to work.

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      2. This is where some moms miss the point. They fail to see it holistically, either for their ego, or because they are not too keen to see that rational life, is more than just what happens at your home. Whether you are a SAHM, or a WM is not the point. The point is, what direction you give your kids. If you are giving them the notions, that working is about the negative points you mentioned above, then its giving assumptions that are not really logical assumptions based on ones experience.

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      3. I truly love being at home and with my kids , but I will work once I see them independent. As a normal person , am not into a notion that I can be very great mom, am just trying to be and more over in this society , I want my kids to be independent and hence They need to see it through me , so I believe in having a job , makes me do my responsibility as a daughter and as mom and helping portion to my husband. I get depressed at times , I feel that my future is blank ,even though I reassure myself at times , that all will be fine. I hate being depressed , and I feel a job keeps us busy and thats is better than an idle time.

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9. I love and agree to parts of the blog and not so agree with some. 🙂 I love how you’ve realised that it is all a choice we make. I think we should each take sometime off and understand what is the most important to us. I have found my balance with part time work (though I hope to quit soon and take up my small baby hammock business) I think I find the right balance when Dhruv gets enough time with me, his grandmom and nanny…not too much to get him bored but enough to keep the fun going.. 🙂

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10. I really didn’t realize there is so much satisfaction for being a stay at home mom. You have the time to write your thoughts in a blog. I’m working and would love to consider this option at some point in my career when I feel I want to.
    Thanks for sharing these thoughts!!

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11. Genuine thoughts..!!

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12. Great read & perfect timing! I’m a new mum for my first baby 🙂 I have chosen to be SAHM too to enjoy my baby boy. Best decision ever I have made. Money & materials come & go but relationships, love & bonding stay on. Hats off to all the SAHM, cos it takes a lot of confidence & courage to be different!

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13. Lovely…

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14. Lovely article…. Keep going..

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15. Beautifully written!!! I can relate to each and every word you hv written. M a SAHM too n love every bit of being one.

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16. Hi Mehaanu,

    Thanks for the good article.

    I should be thankful to my wife, who is providing her support by working.
    But the other-side of the coin, i understood that she might be hurt some-where missing her kid(s) through-out every day while at work.

    Frankly speaking, even now i got an email from my wife asking me to read, digest and analyse this post.

    Undoubtedly i can say that i have read something useful & meaningful article.

    Being a father for two kids, I can relate this to my own family and I can understand the pain that my wife goes through every day at work worrying for my two kids all the time.

    Most importantly every morning my kids look at us helplessly, and every-day i feel that their little-hearts & eyes were asking her mother to stay at home and take care of them. But unfortunately, this is not happening.

    Now i understood my wife’s pain-ful heart.

    Mother, is none other than a “Living God” which god him-self will create & send to take care of the kid(s).

    Even a god is born from a mother, and he him-self can’t survive without a mother.

    From bottom-of-my-heart, I wish & thank every mothers on this planet.

    This is the first time, i am replying to the blog in my life.

    Once again thanks Mehaanu. Wish you all the best for your family & kid(s).

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17. Not sure if anyone said it to you, but I find this blog to be your saga your story (which ofcourse you are entitled to share in social media), but its too subjective and completely reflective of your situation right now.
    I have few problems with the way you write this,
    A) you kind of made a mockery of a 50+ professor by bringing her in picture (maybe you want to re-write her life or maybe you should re-write your blog and avoid her).
    B) You made it feel so simple to be a SAHM or a WM and did not think of grey areas, infact you ruled out the grey areas completely by relying on your peculiar experience in US for working part-time. The truth is that US is not the only country in the world.

    So I thought I may take the benefit of saying here, that let women and each and every one of them make there choice. Please dont over-generalize or over -criminalize the choices we women make by over-analyzing it.

    I gave birth to my daughter in UK and irrespective of what I thought of state support etc etc for working mothers UK had none and I had to stay at home with my child, I enjoyed being with her (because well she is the cutest baby in this whole world and a pure joy) but staying at home is not me (although I love to cook and keep my house tidy). I also had a friend who also gave birth to her child in UK in the same week, but she was sending emails to work from her labor ward and reported to work in 2 days, she by some means had no luxury of taking time off (or for that matter state support) for her child. But her child is also the cutest and growing pretty well. Although she dont bother too much about cooking and cleaning any more.

    I am now in Netherlands, Child support here is often, work -life balance as most of Scandinavia + Netherlands + Germany is a way of life here. I choose to be in full time work because lets just say sending my daughter to the nursery is not too expensive anymore, neither is buying a house, nor is travelling to various places and nor is planning a picnic every week. My in-laws also happen to live close by and they love to have my daughter at their house every week for a day, its not that I am dependent on them(because well I can always send my child to her day care without any additional budget), but the fact that they are grandparents and they love having their grandchild with them. They teach her the Dutch culture and dutch way of life (something I cant because well I am an Indian girl and they are dutch). My daughter is growing in a very fortunate circumstances where she is truly multi-cultural and truly bi-lingual. And I wont want it any other way.

    As of me, I love my research and I spend 3 days working out of home and 2 days working from home (which also gives me enough time to cook, clean and read a book) – I love working part-time (in a way) and almost all the dutch woman work part time (normally taking a break on a Wednesday, which you see is great way of taking a kind of siesta mid-week 😉 )

    And all this is possible, because there is no question on what is better SAHM or WM the state (govt.) and society here do not restrict your ideas and individuality, they let you ACTUALLY BE what you want to be. No one tells you to do a full time job here for half the salary and no one tells you to send your child to day-care if you want to stay at them in your house, no one questions you or no one even talks about I am proud to be SAHM or WM.

    Cmone what are we really proud of here – being mothers (as if we are the only mothers) or being independent woman (as if no other woman worked before us and never will after us) or being super moms (because hell yeah we can handle everything)

    So lets not blog and be happy about our conditions and let our Govts. get confused on what woman wants (men can hardly know that and men in Govt. oh duh!) Lets not even be happy about our conditions (because we can compromise and tell ourselves oh this poop is better then that poop). But lets just make a noise and let the countries understand that …It takes a whole village to raise a child and sometimes a whole country and its system.

    And I believe only when the institutions of a country are accommodating enough for its new baby citizen only then the mothers can make a choice which really belongs to them.

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    1. I think writer of the blog is only trying to build confidence in SHAM’s. Currently in India in 4 big metros or small sub metros like Pune, Bangalore u will find people always praise WM…saying she does it all. But near and dear ones only know how much stressed family is during exams, child recurrent illness (mostly contacted in daycare s), maid tantrums, not so tasty food cooked by maid( Indian mentality makes u yearn for daily fresh home cooked food), less playtime and study time with kids. To keep kids busy send them to so many activity classes post school or playgroup classes along with daycare when less than 3. What happens in nutshell is that lot of money goes in all this…also very less time with kids… Family feels burn out. From this mindset this article is written. Not sure what happens in US but in India..specially ur office is 8hours…but u ought to be 9-10hrs there…less they make point to screw appraisal… Add 1 to 2 hr of transportation…in city like Mumbai. U may spend 3 hrs every day on road…staying near office is great but most of the times rent is so high in such areas that u need to reconsider…againslow moving traffic n honking slowly stresses ur soul…U tend to get annoyed at every thing when back home. From this background SHAM in India makes sense to many as they find peace. In contrast Europe specially countries u mentioned are so social benefit driven ..working there is wonderful. Not that each and every SHAM in India (specially graduates and post graduates who worked hard to study so much)does so only to be near kids Whole time…many do so because office culture(lots of people here have habit of staying late and making time a point during appraisals..also have problems with taking their own leaves as u are questioned so much like u did some crime) and infrastructure takes joy out of their life.

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       1. And u end up with hardly any time… To be spent on Personal life on a weekday. Whatever I have written here is a saga repeated by women friends in IT, banking, advertising and consumer reaseach Specially in Mumbai. Of course women working with universities, colleges, schools, hospitals and manufacturing or any other profession may have different view points.

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    2. Hi Blok… You are lucky to find your balance…. I am lucky to find mine… This is my blog and I have the freedom to express my views… If you have other views, you can write a blog too …then the countries can decide which blog to read and follow 😉

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18. Such a simple n candid share.amazingly thought n presented article.Nce pointers !!

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19. I was a SAHM for many years, but I found that my previously well stimulated brain was becoming stagnant and with that came unhappiness in me which in turn rubbed off on my children because the time we spent was of great quantity but little quality.. So I went back to work part time. I hear what you say about part time work and how it pays, but I wasn’t doing it for the money, I was doing it for my own sanity, my own self esteem and confidence in who I was. With the work the happier me appeared once more and so the time I spent with my children was quality time and they benefited from that as I did. It was a win all round. Now my children are older (the youngest is nearly 16) and I work more now than I did back when they were small, but again it is a choice. I have no financial need to work, but there is most definitely a mental need to do so, and now I have the confidence in who I am to be able to adopt to new challenges and not be as frightened of them as I would have been when I was staying home with my children.

    Obviously there is good and bad on all sides and what works for one doesn’t necessarily work for another. I just know that my children are happier and more well rounded now because I did what I needed to do for me as well as for them, and as my husband says “if momma isn’t happy, no one is happy”

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20. Hi! Very well written article. The best part – it doesn’t come across as judgemental either about SHAMs or WM. Loved it 🙂

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21. I liked both of your views.I can see bit myself in both cases.For money and self confidence sake i work from home( better was office were tea/lunch break was right).Full time at home expectation are high from family.I am enjoying.Because i get time see TV(news/Sports Live)while cooking clean and working.I play with my child instead of sitting in cab long hours.Now i have confidence i can have second child and manage both of them (Financial and emotionally).Yes money to spend is less but i do make little money to by little things for my daughter enjoy small things .May not buy cloths from malls but buy grocery with my little one helping me,Making her understand value of life,money,Family etc.I get tired end of the day but it is only physical .But I AM HAPPY, Live simple .Thank you Ritu and writer of SAHM you ladies made to introspect

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22. Hi mehaanu,

    U just nailed it.very well written. Thank you so much.it has given me very good insight.

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23. Hey lovely article. Being myself a SAHM, this is what I always felt. U nailed it.

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24. Spoke my mind out…I so wanna stay at home, everyday I think I should quit, someday shortly I will….I am so stressed out & unable to enjoy my today with my kids, very true what you said, not necessary to own a house, it puts unnecessary pressure & doesn’t make sense when you are paying EMI… I wanna live my life as these are the best days before the kids grow up …Like u said, Work puts a lot of pressure & I am stressed out & unable to listen to the little things the kids say….
    Here’s hoping I become a SAHM shortly 🙂

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25. Very we’ll thoughts good for india for male or female nice

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26. To each his own. I am working mom of 15 month old. I work from most times. I have nanny coming home to look after baby. I like it this way. I am going to go crazy if I have to look after baby 24 by 7. For me working is less stressful than managing baby. Also I think I need to have an experienced person looking after baby. Just me and husband i dont feel confident. I pay almost half my salary to nanny. But I think it’s worth it.

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27. I enjoyed reading the article mehaanu..I am a SAHM and have always wanted to be..what I appreciate about ur thoughts are that you have experienced the other side, tried to balance it out and come up with your conclusions..so I consider them refined! It is OBVIOUS that being either a SAHM or a WM is an individual s choice and all you have pointed out are the benefits of being there for ur children when they need u..not when time permits or your when your work allows you to. I personally derive great joy in knowing that my daughter comes home with sheer excitement to share her day, or that she knows she has me whenever she needs a shoulder and not whenever possible..and I do have my own hobbies which I pursue with a lot of passion.. I do try my best to keep my brain from turning to mush 🙂 and wait for the day I believe my kids can handle the world as confident adults, to progress in MY life..
    So I appreciate you coming out and writing this blog (regardless of jabs from WM with their share of guilt) and reassure u that if it feels right then there must be something right about it..
    Ps: ritumbra..lucky you to have ur cooperative in laws around to help u raise ur child. Mehaanu-in the US sadly does nt have that option!!!

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    1. Excuse me, but why did you say “regardless of jabs from WM with their share of guilt”. I think that’s very unfair! I did not read any negative comments from any working mom here. And why do you think WMs are guilty? I think you miss the whole point of this article! To me it basically said “CHOOSE FOR YOURSELF and then you will be happy”. Its not a contest!

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28. Amazing write up! I am experiencing the exact same situation as yours and infact I too have started enjoying SAHM phase of my life.. Thanks for this beautiful write up.. Made me smile all the way till end as if someone has written my story 😊 I am also in US and enjoying wat u rightly mentioned independent life 😊

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29. For me there is time for evrything. There is time when u pursue a career and time to raise ur child whom u bought into this world knowing that needs nurturing.I was a sahm for 13 yrs and when my kids 13 and 8 need less of my time I have pursued working still being careful not to take away from there time.I live in us and have the opportunity to work in school system which helps me achieve a balance between work and kids.when my kids older I will have the experience I need to go full time and give more my attention to my work so I’m not left empty nest syndrome.
    But I have to say a beautifully written blog and very aptly put.

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30. Great article. .. each and every word was 100% applicable to me except that I am living in Canada. I am also mother of two, 6 year old girl and 6 months old boy… I’m really happy 2 see my kids growing in front of me… great work.. please continue ur good work

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31. hi there,

    Don’t know where to start with?I m a SAHM..Infact Ihave never worked after marriage..I alwaz wanted to be a dutiful wife and a mother..and that’s what I m now..I love my time with my 20 mnths old son,love to cook for my husband and taking care of the household chores.Not that I wos forced to stay at home…It has alwaz been my choice..My husband NEVER EVER enforced the harsh facts of daily living thus making all the daz and years till now a smooth ride for me by taking care all the financial aspects himself subtly…same goes for my In-laws as well..So here I m happily staying at home ..lucky enough t bring up my child in front of my own eyes independently…I have never replied to any article o far but urs is a bang-on dear..Hats off to u for writing it so beautifully without hurting any body’s sentiments…I wos working before marriage so I know tthe perks of it but SAHM AND A HOMEMAKER has more definitely..!!Juss keep up the good work..And bless ur lil ones!!

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32. Your write up is well measured and very well written. Reading your blog post took me back to the time when I made a conscious decision/ choice of quitting my corporate job after 8 years of work to raise my daughter. My daughter was 3 plus when I quit and now she is 12 plus and I am so glad I made the right choice for myself. The kids minds are bursting with questions and queries and being there for her during those formative years was the best thing I could do for her. It also helped our bond grow strong. I am very happy and contented SAHM 🙂

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    1. Your points are so valid, well done! I have been on all sides of the fence and my personal experience is that people respect a content person and envy them. If you crib about not having a job (like me), no one respects you , besides the grass is always green on the other side.

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33. Needless to say it again…. Lovely article. Very beautifully explained. I was exactly in the same situation 2 yrs back and had discussed most of the points brought up in the article with my hubby and finally decided to be a SAHM. thoroughly enjoying it and content with my decision.

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34. I was working in india doing homeopathic practice . My carreer wasn’t so great nor I was gonna make money ,but I was satisfied and happy , I had lot of aims to achive , I was confident . It was only 5 hours a day . And now in USA I m SAHM, never by my choice . I belive kids need us only until one age . After they are grown up , I wud definitely like to start my career , off course I will manage my timings as per my family need, because as a doctor I was my own boss . Hubby makes lot of money but still Now life Is no fun . I hate being SAHM .

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    1. If you hate SAHM then why continue to be one… Life is too short to be doing something we don’t like… Remember you always have a choice… If you have money then hire a part time help because doing the same work daily can get boring… When you get a break to pursue your hobbies, life gets fun… do some workshops at Michaels…learn something new on the internet… develop yourself…. This is what I do !

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35. Very well written. I m a mother of two beautiful daughters. My 2nd child is just one month old and I m on maternity leave. Ur article seems to b written just for me.

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36. after a long time a sensible and well written piece on SAHM.. Loved it and agree with almost all points… Its the Choice that matters for one to enjoy what ever path they choose, be it SAHM OR WM.. 👍👍

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37. Meehanu,

    Well written. Although I would not completely agree to contents. I appreciate what you do as a mom spending time with your children, enjoying them. I do understand SAHM is not a easy job. Am glad that you are lucky, but please don’t term WM as unlucky. It hurts. The article sounds in way which criticizes a working mom for the choice that she made. I stand by a long rant where she highlights, not every one has the liberty of making the choices she wants. It also reflects much of your agony/envy by saying “I don’t own a house”, I don’t own jewelry – meaning if a working mom does, why do you have to compare yourself with her. Why do you weigh yourself against her? I work and a mom of 2 kids, and I still buy used baby gear for my kids.

    You have mentioned that WM are chasing a pot of gold – chasing a pot of gold is much more of a personal choice. You can be SAHM and still be chasing a pot of gold, still be not contended, still be not happy with what you have. It is more of an individual’s measurement of what happiness means.

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    1. Hi Pot of gold…I still believe that everyone has a choice… This is what I feel… When is money enough ? Who decides you send your kids to Public or Private school..?..who chooses to stay in a new country where you are alone instead of your home country where you have a support system..?.. We choose… and then if we become working mothers to support our earlier choices we lament that ‘I don’t have a choice…I need to work’… If one is a single / divorced mother its again her choice not to remarry… She chooses to work…great… Make a choice and enjoy it…
       I meet desolate women who think that things happen to them… They don’t realise that they have the power to change things !
       BTW when did I say that WM are unlucky and when did I criticize them ?? Maybe I missed that part in my blog !
       and yes I agree that an SAHM can be chasing a pot of gold too…. But I am not one of them and this is my personal experience…Please remember the blog is about me…I know it sounds narcissist but the truth is that its not a generalization… 🙂

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38. Lovely article. …written so well…loved it

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39. It is a good post! I’m a SAHM, as you know, and I love it. My husband and I decided early in our relationship that I should stay at home, he had a SAHM and he has find memories of his childhood. I was raised by a single, sometimes working mom and I have less fond memories.
    I dont feel that I am getting, hmmm, less intelligent to paraphrase some of the comments. I might at some time start my own company, but not now. My current work is too important.

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40. It is a great article which is causing a lot of us to think about why we do what we do. I understand your point of view and I totally agree to each her own !

    Though, I do have certain concerns with this line of thought process. Women want and deserve equal rights in this world. We are all fighting for equal pay, equal rights to climb the corporate or any career ladder. Unfortunately, these decisions are made by people on top. Unless we have women on top, we will never be able to achieve our demands. This is how the world operates, people with money and power get to choose what is right for others. I am not saying this is the correct way or the only way, but I am saying this is the way that currently works. If we leave the workforce (corporate world or advertising or politics or education or research), we will have no one to represent us or fight for us. I think it is our responsibility as a woman, to continue to be a part of the workforce.

    If we don’t have women in the corporate world, we will continue to get poor maternity policies. If we don’t have women in politics, we will continue to have laws made biased towards men. If we don’t have women in workforce, our sons and daughters will grow up to see only men in control and pushed into believing that men are supposed to work and earn money and women are supposed to run the house. In USA, the only way the women got their right to vote was after they started working, contributing to the growth of a company/ nation, going on strikes and fighting for their rights.

    I think this will also helps out our husbands, as they will not have the sole responsibility of raising the family. I am sure this will relieve some of their stress and enable them to relax and spend more time with their kids.

    Human beings have managed to make our lives very busy and complicated. But, finding the right balance is very important.

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    1. profound ! i never thought so far !

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       1. Yes, Google would not have set up expectant mother parking had it not been for a pregnant woman in the leadership team (Sheryl Sandberg) who experienced the discomfort of a pregnant women having to park very far from the building. Women in leadership roles in corporations, government can change existing biases to make these better for all working women (whether or not they are married or have kids). I’m a big follower of the Lean In philosophy but realize that this might not be for all.

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41. I loved most parts of your blog. Not that I encourage or discourage SHAM or WM..but SHAM does leads to less stress as there is less to think about And that energy can be spent with kids and a lot of peaceful energy will transfer to them as meal times are elaborate, bed time n stories are told for longer, more time spent on what is happening with studies n school.

    Something that didn’t go well was choice… when choice is being written there is a sample mothers who are married to high or super high income group men is assumed(talking from Indian economics pertaining to big cities). There is an assumption. Because even for a middle income double income couple in India Who lives on rent in these big cities..taking care of expenses for 1 or 2 kids means both should be working. Add to it financial assistance to parents and in laws u need more. Not all people have choices and that is how it is here. Like lady from NL said free day cares..well that is not here..free schools..yes …but quality… Poor…upbringing ..Poor. Forcing many women who want to be SHAM so that they take care of kids their way..enjoy every bit.. to work… At same time many jobs take ur so much time that women who wanna use choice of work … Quit N become SHAM. Government policies in India are required for making economy, infrastructure and social set-up women friendly..women centric..special women who have kids.

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42. Interesting article, you make some good points. But the assumption that only women need to decide/choose if they should or should not stay at home is a bit too gender-restrictive/essentialist. How about also including the perspectives of “Stay at home fathers” who are not the bread-winnders of the household or single parents (single by choice, divorced or widowed)? I think it would add value to your article. Best wishes! AM

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43. Wh or sahm both have pros and con’s and I think we should do what makes us happy and content..you cannot have best of both worlds and all will have some reasons for the choice…in short I enjoy being wh though I have 2 kids…sharing equal responsibility at home with your husband gives you enough time to enjoy with kids…and regarding maids I have seen many sahm depending on no of maids even though they are at home and simply don’t want to work.. …its all choice of individuals..

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44. PS. I guess to read this article one has to assume that “males” will always be the designated breadwinners and that “husbands” will always be around (no single mothers, no divorcees, no widows, etc), then it is perhaps quite easy to feel so lucky and justify the choice of being SAHM. Anyway, good effort on the article.

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45. It is great to know that you are happy with the choices you have made!!

    I do not agree 100% with your blog.

    Being happy,relaxed, clean home, enjoying life and motherhood, freedom, health and well being and peace of mind is what you care for and important to you as well as everyone(man/woman).It is great to know that you are exploring how to have it all.

    However i think regardless of whether you are working, not working, working on a full time job or part time job, mother, married or single, man or a woman it is possible to be happy,relaxed, clean home, enjoying life, freedom, healthy and peaceful.

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46. Beautifully written and I can totally relate to it. But, after working for more than 6yrs (with one yr after my first born turned 3),I still wonder…. What if one fine day I find too much time at hand? I can see that happening with my first born, he is getting more and more independent by the day…and pretty soon the same will be the case with my second born too!
    Another thing that I often wonder about it the responsibility of being a SHAM! Often if a child misbehaves, it’s immediately blamed on the mother saying that she hasn’t taught him anything even though she stays at home…. That’s the irony of it all…. Kids behave as they wish irrespective of working or non working mom. But all in all I am enjoying being a SHAM at the moment.

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47. Sorry, but I feel the article is made for stay home moms to feel better with wrong reasons. Such a shame to read.

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48. Hi, I think each women needs to make decisions about her life and be happy with the same. She should be also be open to re-think her decisions and change if needed. Each women has her own life and ups and downs.
    I am a working women and am very proud of the same. I have 2 lovely daughters, a very supportive husband, great in laws. It’s all possible for me. I enjoy my work, my evening with family, weekends, vacations.
    I feel great satisfaction of contributing one drop to the economy and still a big contribution to my important family.

    Life is too short and it’s not possible to all experiences. Choose small things and be happy.

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49. Pingback: Indian Moms Connect | #thedress and the Mommy Wars - Indian Moms Connect

50. Sorry to be a straight shooter here…u seem to be suffering from self serving bias…This blog (including comments) is a way of you telling the world what you are doing is the best and reinforcement for yourself…Every stage of your life you have done something for whatever reasons and you are justifying it by means of these writings.Obviously everybody does this and this is the only way in which humans can be happy with what they get….But sorry, people reading your blog will only get the tilt and bias in language and not a true perspective unless you put the disclaimer. Dont get me wrong…Being a mom(both SAHM or working)itself is extremely tough, taxing, enjoyable etc etc…But why push your views down others throat when they are not looking !!
    PS: I am a guy and honestly feel you are extremely mature and person full of knowledge. Most of the women dont even get to the first stage of enjoying what they do.

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